Blonde man in bathroom: Wife asks if he found shampoo. \u201cYes, but it\u2019s for dry hair, and mine\u2019s wet.\u201d<\/p>\n
Blonde man sees \u201cDO NOT BEND\u201d letter on doormat, spends hours figuring out how to pick it up.<\/p>\n
Blonde man on phone: \u201cWife\u2019s pregnant, contractions two minutes apart!\u201d Doc: \u201cFirst child?\u201d Man: \u201cNo, I\u2019m her husband!\u201d<\/p>\n
Blonde man in jail, hanging by feet. Guard: \u201cWhat are you doing?\u201d Man: \u201cHanging myself.\u201d Guard: \u201cRope goes around neck.\u201d Man: \u201cTried that, couldn\u2019t breathe.\u201d<\/p>\n
Italian asks blonde man: \u201cWhy do scuba divers fall backward off boats?\u201d Man: \u201cDuh, forward, they\u2019d stay on the boat.\u201d<\/p>\n
Friend to blonde man: \u201cChristmas is on a Friday.\u201d Man: \u201cHope it\u2019s not the 13th.\u201d<\/p>\n
Two blonde men find three grenades, plan to take them to police. One: \u201cWhat if one explodes?\u201d Other: \u201cWe\u2019ll say we found two.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"