An old couple had been married 50 years. Every morning, the husband farted loudly and laughed, while his wife warned, \u201cOne day you\u2019ll fart your guts out.\u201d<\/p>\n
On Thanksgiving, the wife filled his underwear with turkey innards. When he got up, he followed his usual fart-laugh\u2026 then screamed, fell silent for ten minutes, and later admitted:
\u201cToday it finally happened, but by the grace of God and these two fingers, I got \u2019em all back in and I\u2019m gonna be OK.\u201d<\/p>\n
Harold and Edna, married over 60 years, had a mysterious shoebox. On her deathbed, Edna let Harold open it\u2014inside were two crocheted dolls and $95,000. She explained that each doll represented a time she got angry at him. Only two dolls meant she\u2019d only been mad twice in 60 years; the rest of the money came from selling the other dolls.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"