Sure thing — here’s a shortened version of your story that keeps the tone and core meaning intact:
Jack and I had only been in the rental one night — small, one-story, plain. Just a temp work assignment.
We were still unpacking when the doorbell rang.
“No curtains yet,” Jack groaned.
Through the peephole, I saw her: pastel cardigan, tray of cookies, eyes scanning like she was casing the place.
“Hi!” she chirped. “I’m Lindsey, across the street. Just saying welcome!”
Her smile was bright, but her gaze kept drifting past us, into the house.
“You settling in?” she asked, blinking fast.
“Just moved in yesterday,” I said.
“It’s a tidy neighborhood,” she added. “And our HOA—very friendly but firm—has a one-car driveway rule.”
Jack raised a brow. “Both cars fit fine.”
“Still—one house, one car,” she smiled, too wide. “Rules are rules.”
“Appreciate the cookies,” Jack said flatly.
Three days later, we woke to clank—whirrr. Two tow trucks. Both our cars halfway lifted.
“HOA violation,” one guy said. “Orders came this morning.”
Across the street stood Lindsey. Bathrobe, coffee mug, smug smile.
“You really did it, huh?” I said.
She frowned. “What’s funny?”
I pointed to the barely visible sticker on our windshield.
“You owe us twenty-five grand,” I said.
Her smile faded. She squinted at the sticker, confused. We walked inside without answering her questions.
Later that night, I made a call. “We’ve got a situation. Civilian interference. Property tampering.”
“Understood,” came the reply.
At sunrise, a black SUV pulled up. A man in a suit and sunglasses stepped out and joined us at Lindsey’s door.
She opened it, still in her robe. The agent flashed his badge.
“You’re under investigation for interfering with an active federal operation.”
Her face went pale.
“You had two marked government vehicles towed,” he said. “You disrupted two undercover agents. Total damages: twenty-five thousand dollars.”
Her mug dropped and shattered.
Jack stepped forward. “Maybe don’t play sheriff next time.”
“You’ll be contacted,” the agent said. “Do not leave the area.”
We turned to go. I paused.
“Next time, just bake the cookies.”
Want it even tighter or formatted like a script?
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