A mother is driving her daughter to a playdate.
“Mommy, how old are you?” the girl asks.
“Don’t ask a lady her age,” her mother replies. “That’s not polite.”
“Okay… how much do you weigh?”
“Those are personal questions,” the mother says.
“Why did you and Daddy get divorced?”
“Enough questions!” the mother snaps.
Later, the child’s friend says, “If you want answers, just look at her driver’s licence. It tells you everything.”
That night, the girl tells her mother:
“I know you’re 32.”
Her mother is shocked. “How did you find that out?”
“And I know you weigh 130 pounds.”
“How on earth did you learn that?”
“And I know why you and Daddy got divorced.”
“Why?”
“Because you got an F in sex.”
A little girl notices her mother’s white hairs.
“Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?”
“Every time you do something wrong and make me sad, one turns white,” her mother says.
The girl thinks for a moment, then asks:
“So why is Grandma’s hair all white?”
And finally:
A boy starts eating before prayer at dinner.
“Wait until we say grace,” his mother says.
“I don’t have to,” he replies.
“That’s our rule at home!”
“This isn’t our house,” he says. “This is Grandma’s house—and she knows how to cook.”