My granddaughter Olivia is 15. Her mother died of cancer when Olivia was eight, and she never really recovered.
Three years later my son Scott remarried Lydia, who at first seemed nice. But she began making hurtful comments to Olivia and, after having twins with Scott, treated Olivia like free childcare.
Three weeks ago Olivia’s school bus was in an accident. She fractured her collarbone and was told to rest. While Scott was away on a work trip, Lydia left injured Olivia alone with the twins all day to do the cooking, cleaning, and childcare — while she went out for brunch and wine.
When I discovered this, I went to Scott’s house, packed all of Lydia’s luxury items into four locked suitcases, and told her she could only get them back if she spent four days taking care of the house, the twins, and Olivia without complaining — the same time Scott had been gone.
By day four Lydia was exhausted but had a clean house, calm twins, and had treated Olivia with real care. When Scott returned confused, I told him Lydia learned what domestic life looks like without outsourcing it to a child.
Before I left, I gave Lydia the suitcase codes and told her: Olivia is a kid who needs care, not chores — and if she slipped again, I’d bring six suitcases next time.