An old couple had been married 50 years. Every morning, the husband farted loudly and laughed, while his wife warned, “One day you’ll fart your guts out.”
On Thanksgiving, the wife filled his underwear with turkey innards. When he got up, he followed his usual fart-laugh… then screamed, fell silent for ten minutes, and later admitted:
“Today it finally happened, but by the grace of God and these two fingers, I got ’em all back in and I’m gonna be OK.”
Harold and Edna, married over 60 years, had a mysterious shoebox. On her deathbed, Edna let Harold open it—inside were two crocheted dolls and $95,000. She explained that each doll represented a time she got angry at him. Only two dolls meant she’d only been mad twice in 60 years; the rest of the money came from selling the other dolls.